How to hold memorial ceremony within 100 days after the death of a relative

In modern times, funeral rituals and customs are no longer as complicated as they used to be, but many rural areas still retain very traditional funeral customs. What are the taboos within 100 days after the death of a loved one? How to hold memorial services within 100 days after the death?

Taboos within 100 days after the death of a loved one

——Avoid posting red couplets <br/>Posting red couplets during the Spring Festival is our traditional Chinese New Year custom. However, if a direct relative in the family has passed away, it is taboo to post red couplets in front of the door during the first Spring Festival. Today's society is more open, and people take birth, aging, sickness and death more lightly, and are not as taboo as they used to be. However, the customs introduced above still need to be taken into account with some Feng Shui, which will be good for future development fortunes.
——It is taboo to visit relatives and friends to attend happy events .<br/>Within one hundred days after the death of an immediate family member, it is best to stay at home and observe mourning. Unless necessary, do not travel, visit relatives and friends, etc., so as not to bring your sadness to others. During the mourning period, it is taboo to visit relatives and friends, especially to attend weddings. It is best not to attend happy events, especially weddings, business openings, celebrations of the birth of a baby, etc.
——Avoid participating in entertainment activities <br/>In ancient times, if someone passed away in the family, the children would generally observe mourning for three years. During this three-year mourning period, they were not allowed to hold weddings or any other auspicious events. In ancient times, people emphasized "governing the world with filial piety." Officials, no matter how high their positions, had to ask for leave to return to their ancestral hometown to observe mourning when their parents passed away. This was called "Dingyou." If an official does not return to his hometown to observe mourning, he may be impeached and punished by the censor. In serious cases, he may even be fired forever. If an official gets married, has children, divides the family property, or enjoys himself during the period of mourning, he will be regarded as unfilial and will be impeached. In modern society, many people shorten the mourning period to one year or even shorter, but they forbid their children from engaging in entertainment activities.

How to hold memorial ceremony for the 100th day after death

1. The hundred days after death is called “baiqi”, and is called “guobairi” in literature. It is also one of the regular memorial days. Ordinary relatives of the deceased will not come on this day, but the deceased's relatives and younger close relatives such as nephews, married daughters, etc. must go to the grave to offer sacrifices. The filial son will go to the grave to invite the spirit in the afternoon of the previous day. He will burn paper to pay tribute in front of the grave, and then hold the "tablet" on his head. When he arrives at the gate, his children will cry to welcome him. After dark, he will burn night paper to pay tribute. After breakfast the next day, he will cry and pay tribute in front of the tablet again. This is called "burning paper for a hundred days."
2. Due to environmental protection, burning paper and lighting candles are not allowed in cemeteries in urban areas, so people began to use flowers instead of paper and wax. The flowers used for visiting graves are generally white or yellow, such as yellow chrysanthemum, white chrysanthemum, yellow rose, white rose, white lily and so on. However, some do not use yellow and white, but choose light-colored flowers, such as champagne roses, pink roses, etc. Remember not to choose bright flowers, bright clothes, etc. when visiting the graves, so as not to give people the impression that you are disrespecting the deceased.