Funny sayings for Chinese Valentine's Day 2017 Chinese Valentine's Day funny jokes

The 2017 Chinese Valentine's Day is coming soon. When you see others showing off their affection on WeChat Moments, single people should post something like this to fight back. Next, let’s take a look at the collection of hilarious jokes for the 2017 Chinese Valentine’s Day.

2017 Chinese Valentine's Day hilarious jokes

Beginner's Edition

1. History always repeats itself surprisingly. I was single on Chinese Valentine’s Day two years ago, I was single on Chinese Valentine’s Day last year, and I am still single on Chinese Valentine’s Day this year.
2. Today is Valentine's Day, but what does it have to do with me? It has always been a Valentine's Day without a lover.
3. On the Chinese Valentine's Day, I calculated with my fingers, and if nothing unexpected happens, it has nothing to do with me.
4. Someone asked me to spend the Chinese Valentine’s Day with him. I was decisive and refused. On days like this, you have to enjoy your solitude alone to make yourself stand out.
5. Don’t ask me how I spent the Chinese Valentine’s Day. I will only tell you that I slept well and ate well next Monday.

6. What a damn new society! Why are there no arranged marriages? It’s why I’m still single today!
7. Last year someone asked me how I spent the Chinese Valentine’s Day, and I just laughed it off. Today someone asked me how I spent the Chinese Valentine’s Day, and I thought about it and said: just skip it.
8. Today is Chinese Valentine’s Day and I am going to meet the other party’s parents. I am so nervous because, after all, I was the one who hit his son first.
9. Chinese Valentine's Day is coming soon. I wrote three hundred little notes saying "Let's break up" and stuffed them into every box of chocolate on the supermarket shelves. Don’t ask who I am, I am Lei Feng.
10. It’s really not easy. In order to send this text message to you who has good looks, a good figure, a good temperament, is loved by everyone and is popular with every car, I fought off 10 handsome guys by myself. I wish you a happy Chinese Valentine's Day!

Advanced

1. I hope that on Chinese Valentine's Day, the girl who loves me can give me a rose, and the guy who loves me can give me a chrysanthemum.
2. Just received the Jade Emperor's decree: The Cowherd and the Weaver Girl fell off the Magpie Bridge due to excessive excitement, so the Chinese Valentine's Day is cancelled. Please tell your lovers and friends.
3. I believe that on Chinese Valentine's Day, someone will come to me with a big bouquet of flowers and say to me, "Please make way, thank you."
4. "What will you give me for Valentine's Day?" "I'll send you a thousand miles away."

5. I heard that Chinese Valentine's Day is coming, but what about me? No one wants me. No one wants me. No one wants me. No one wants me. No one wants me. No one wants me. No one wants me. No one wants me. No one wants me. No one wants me. No one wants me. No one wants me.

6. It’s been a long time since we last met, but I always keep your motto in mind: steamed buns are precious, but dumplings are even more expensive, and if there are roasted spare ribs, both can be thrown away. My lovely best friend, happy Chinese Valentine's Day!
7. Valentine's Day is here. I don't have anything good to give you, so I'll just give you a pair of couplets. First line: Looking at the autumn eyes with a cold brow; Second line: Willing to be a bachelor; Horizontal banner: Long live the bachelors! Happy Valentine's Day haha
8. Don’t ask me out on Chinese Valentine’s Day. I’m very busy. I have to sell flowers during the day and condoms at night. In the early morning, I had to squat at the door of the hotel to sell medicine, and a week later I sold pregnancy test sticks.

9. In fact, the Chinese Valentine's Day and the Mid-Autumn Festival are the same, except that the Chinese Valentine's Day is about burning money for the living, while the Mid-Autumn Festival is about burning money for the dead. The Chinese Valentine's Day is about telling a lot of ghost stories to people, while the Mid-Autumn Festival is about telling a lot of human stories to ghosts.
10. Chinese Valentine's Day is coming soon. I just went downstairs to buy something and the boss asked me, "Sir, do you want to buy flowers?" "What for?" "I'm buying flowers for my girlfriend." "Oh, how many flowers do I need to give to my girlfriend?" Then the boss took the flowers away silently. . .

Advanced

1. "Are you still alone on Chinese Valentine's Day?" "I'm afraid I'll scare you if I'm half alone."
2. Someone asked me if I would still be alone on Chinese Valentine’s Day? Damn, will I turn into a dog? !
3. The person who will marry me in the future please don’t do anything that would let me down on Valentine’s Day. Thank you.
4. Are you short of light bulbs on Valentine's Day? The kind that sits and eats without talking. I will leave after you finish eating, really. I can also help you take pictures, and I can also edit them.
5. Among all the curses related to the Chinese Valentine's Day that I have seen so far, this is the most vicious: Cursing the Weaver Girl to have her period on the Chinese Valentine's Day!

6. Are you busy? fine. I just want to tell you in a way that won’t disturb you: I’m thinking of you. I hope you will smile when you receive my text message. Let your friends around you know that you are happy. Happy Chinese Valentine's Day!
7. Chinese Valentine's Day is coming. I want to find a person of the opposite sex to be my lover for a day. No kissing, no hugging. We can hold hands and go to the movies, eat, go shopping, and then go home separately. We will wait until the early morning and send each other a text message: "Let's break up." If both parties have feelings for each other, then send a message: "Let's be together"~
8. Loving you for ten thousand years is an exaggeration! It’s hopeless to love you for five thousand years! Loving you for a thousand years is ridiculous! Loving you for a hundred years is too long! Loving you for 70 years in a row, as long as I am healthy, this is my strength.
9. Do you know? I haven't seen you these few days, and I'm so lost that I want to commit suicide: I have tried hanging myself with noodles, hitting my head with tofu, and cutting my wrists with noodles, but I was afraid that no one would spend Chinese Valentine's Day with you, so I had to give up. Happy Chinese Valentine's Day.
10. Confess your love on February 14th! Confession on March 14th! Confession on April 1st too! Confession on May 20th too! I have to confess my love again after graduating in June! ! Your sister has to confess her love on Valentine's Day. It turns out that it’s my period that’s confessing! ! ! ! ! ! !